Annie Grace gave the world a gift when she wrote This Naked Mind. It’s what I had wanted “the big book”of AA to be. No offense meant to the big book. Maybe a little though.
Well done, and good for you that you found something that was working for you. I quit snus (a small "pouch" of tobacco you put between your upper lip and gum and keep there for a while, very popular in the Scandinavian countries) four years ago, for the last time. I had tried some times before, and even for a longer time too, but kept coming back to using it. Previously I had the wrong mindset about it, but four years ago I had money issues (a credit card I wasn't able to pay down, and living from hand to mouth every month) and so I started to write down how much money I spent on snus. Back then a box cost me about €6.80 (77 NOK) and I wrote down in a note on my phone every time I bought some and how much I payed. I was shocked, embarrassed, ashamed, and it was a big reality-check for me to actually see how much I spent on it.
Since then, I have not had any snus and I have paid down my credit card. Haven't had a credit card in more than a year now.
I rarely drink alcohol too, but that's another story.
Those are some great questions you have there in your post, I hope someone who needs them are able to read them.
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I'm so glad to hear you found the motivation you needed to quit snus and find greater financial freedom. So many positive changes to celebrate!
Nodding my head throughout, Ellie! Annie Grace’s book, podcast, and online Alcohol Experiment were a key piece in my decision to stop drinking. I love the science she shares, as well as her teachings around cognitive dissonance and getting curious about whether alcohol actually delivers what it promises. For me, once I began paying close attention, it was so clear it did not. While I was still drinking each night, I even wrote myself a post-it as evidence. It said: "This [drinking alcohol] doesn't even WORK! I'm still anxious! I'm still stressed out!" Then, I started with 10 days without a clear plan to quit forever. That was nearly four years ago, and I haven't had alcohol since.
Yep, exactly the same! I did the 30 Day Alcohol experiment too (twice) and also signed up to her 100 days of lasting change emails. She shares so many great tools, to help with just being a human! I never knew that before - how to just be with feelings rather than being afraid of them
This is an incredible way of moving through an addiction to anything, substance or otherwise. We use it to serve a purpose, but that question of whether it’s actually serving that purpose is one I hadn’t thought about.
Getting curious is one of my best tools when I come up to something in myself that is challenging, and I often write about that in my parenting journey. I’m so curious about the first book you mentioned now!
So glad to hear it resonated Aleesha. Yes, it's a totally different approach to 'just don't do the thing!' which can feel impossible and trigger a lot of shame when we find that willpower doesn't work (thinking - why can't I just stop doing the thing??). But when we find something - whether it's a substance, behaviour or anything that makes us feel better, helps us cope, our brain narrows in on that so that we keep doing it. It's a perfectly innocent thing to happen - to be drawn to things we think are helping us.
That's why the key to unhooking is to question: is this REALLY helping me in the way we think it is? Getting curious. And changing both our unconscious/automatic thinking as well as our conscious/rational thinking.
And yes - I'm so with you on the curiosity approach being relevant to so many areas of life, like parenting! It's so powerful to pause and reflect and think 'hmmm, what's really going on here?' without judgement, blame or shame, just 'this is interesting'.
I am so curious to read this book! I’ve been sober for three years and it was easy to stop because I wasn’t continuously drink but when I did, it was uncontrollable. I didn’t think much about it after that. This past year has been so hard and I have found myself wanting to drink. Thank you for sharing your words and that book, I am so curious to read.
Annie Grace gave the world a gift when she wrote This Naked Mind. It’s what I had wanted “the big book”of AA to be. No offense meant to the big book. Maybe a little though.
Very interesting. And it makes sense when I compare it to my own journey (though my drug was never alcohol).
A compelling story. You have a voice that needs to be heard
Thank you so much Jerry
Well done, and good for you that you found something that was working for you. I quit snus (a small "pouch" of tobacco you put between your upper lip and gum and keep there for a while, very popular in the Scandinavian countries) four years ago, for the last time. I had tried some times before, and even for a longer time too, but kept coming back to using it. Previously I had the wrong mindset about it, but four years ago I had money issues (a credit card I wasn't able to pay down, and living from hand to mouth every month) and so I started to write down how much money I spent on snus. Back then a box cost me about €6.80 (77 NOK) and I wrote down in a note on my phone every time I bought some and how much I payed. I was shocked, embarrassed, ashamed, and it was a big reality-check for me to actually see how much I spent on it.
Since then, I have not had any snus and I have paid down my credit card. Haven't had a credit card in more than a year now.
I rarely drink alcohol too, but that's another story.
Those are some great questions you have there in your post, I hope someone who needs them are able to read them.
Hi Elisabeth,
Thank you so much for sharing your story. I'm so glad to hear you found the motivation you needed to quit snus and find greater financial freedom. So many positive changes to celebrate!
Nodding my head throughout, Ellie! Annie Grace’s book, podcast, and online Alcohol Experiment were a key piece in my decision to stop drinking. I love the science she shares, as well as her teachings around cognitive dissonance and getting curious about whether alcohol actually delivers what it promises. For me, once I began paying close attention, it was so clear it did not. While I was still drinking each night, I even wrote myself a post-it as evidence. It said: "This [drinking alcohol] doesn't even WORK! I'm still anxious! I'm still stressed out!" Then, I started with 10 days without a clear plan to quit forever. That was nearly four years ago, and I haven't had alcohol since.
Yep, exactly the same! I did the 30 Day Alcohol experiment too (twice) and also signed up to her 100 days of lasting change emails. She shares so many great tools, to help with just being a human! I never knew that before - how to just be with feelings rather than being afraid of them
So interesting Ellie to read about your process. I’m looking forward to reading more ☺️ xx
This is an incredible way of moving through an addiction to anything, substance or otherwise. We use it to serve a purpose, but that question of whether it’s actually serving that purpose is one I hadn’t thought about.
Getting curious is one of my best tools when I come up to something in myself that is challenging, and I often write about that in my parenting journey. I’m so curious about the first book you mentioned now!
Love this, Ellie
So glad to hear it resonated Aleesha. Yes, it's a totally different approach to 'just don't do the thing!' which can feel impossible and trigger a lot of shame when we find that willpower doesn't work (thinking - why can't I just stop doing the thing??). But when we find something - whether it's a substance, behaviour or anything that makes us feel better, helps us cope, our brain narrows in on that so that we keep doing it. It's a perfectly innocent thing to happen - to be drawn to things we think are helping us.
That's why the key to unhooking is to question: is this REALLY helping me in the way we think it is? Getting curious. And changing both our unconscious/automatic thinking as well as our conscious/rational thinking.
And yes - I'm so with you on the curiosity approach being relevant to so many areas of life, like parenting! It's so powerful to pause and reflect and think 'hmmm, what's really going on here?' without judgement, blame or shame, just 'this is interesting'.
I am so curious to read this book! I’ve been sober for three years and it was easy to stop because I wasn’t continuously drink but when I did, it was uncontrollable. I didn’t think much about it after that. This past year has been so hard and I have found myself wanting to drink. Thank you for sharing your words and that book, I am so curious to read.
Sounds like it could be a great one to explore 😊