Ellie this is so well-articulated. I like the simplicity of the love for self, overcoming the pain. I don't mean it is easy to do. I mean it is straightforward and honest. Thank you.✨
Thank you for your kind words Trudi. And yes, it is so simple isn't it - and there's a relief in that. It takes practice, but it is possible. Thank you for being here.
This is beautiful friend. When things are hard or uncomfortable, I put my hand in my heart and say you’re doing great to myself. When I’m starting to get critical of myself, I try to say how human of me to feel...and insert what I am feeling. It is a practice to come back to loving myself.
I don’t always meet pain with love as the default but I’m practicing it and learning a more compassionate path as I grow. More often than not I do meet myself with love instead of shame or more pain… and I’m proud of that. Beautiful reflections and supportive words as always Ellie xxx
Ah so wonderful to hear you say you are proud of yourself - so beautiful. That is letting go of perfectionism isn’t it! Even if we remember once in a hundred times, and before we didn’t ever treat ourselves with love, then that is amazing; that is progress.
In early sobriety, I was taught it was important to recognize that I could tolerate discomfort without drinking. I needed to learn this because, like most of us, I was raised in an environment where I was encouraged to resist my emotional experience.
I've come to realize that tolerating my discomfort, or distress, was only the beginning. Next, I needed to stop trying to control it and just experience it, because it is there to tell me something. My job is to determine what that is.
Absolutely Tom - our body has so much wisdom and it takes practice to learn to listen to it, and to feel safe noticing and listening to uncomfortable feelings and sensations. Thank you for sharing your experience.
Yup. That is how I quit drinking, too. Meeting my pain with love. And becoming aware and willing to acknowledge when I was in discomfort (which was way more frequently than I ever actually knew before)- which goes to show you how much we really are numbing. For me, it got to the point where I was numb before I even poured my drink. That’s the power of an addictive substance.
“ It’s that simple, and that hard.” So true. So true, Ellie.
One of my favorite lyrics from a song is from Jason Isbell: “It gets easier but it never gets easy. I would say it’s all worth it but you won’t believe me.”
Yup. Best kind of hard I know.
Thanks for sharing here how to guide ourselves with compassion through the hard. 💕
Oh Allison your words really moved me. Thank you for sharing. And I love those song lyrics.
I really relate to how difficult it can be to even notice we're in discomfort. I still have that experience now: it's only when I pause and get still that I notice how much tension is in my body, and how often feelings of fear and sadness are here that I wasn't even acknowledging.
Ellie this is so well-articulated. I like the simplicity of the love for self, overcoming the pain. I don't mean it is easy to do. I mean it is straightforward and honest. Thank you.✨
Thank you for your kind words Trudi. And yes, it is so simple isn't it - and there's a relief in that. It takes practice, but it is possible. Thank you for being here.
Thank you for sharing your experiences.
This is beautiful friend. When things are hard or uncomfortable, I put my hand in my heart and say you’re doing great to myself. When I’m starting to get critical of myself, I try to say how human of me to feel...and insert what I am feeling. It is a practice to come back to loving myself.
That’s beautiful Emma ‘how human of me to feel…’ Yes, that is a such a helpful and compassionate reminder.
That’s language from Elena Brower...it serves me deeply.
I don’t always meet pain with love as the default but I’m practicing it and learning a more compassionate path as I grow. More often than not I do meet myself with love instead of shame or more pain… and I’m proud of that. Beautiful reflections and supportive words as always Ellie xxx
Ah so wonderful to hear you say you are proud of yourself - so beautiful. That is letting go of perfectionism isn’t it! Even if we remember once in a hundred times, and before we didn’t ever treat ourselves with love, then that is amazing; that is progress.
In early sobriety, I was taught it was important to recognize that I could tolerate discomfort without drinking. I needed to learn this because, like most of us, I was raised in an environment where I was encouraged to resist my emotional experience.
I've come to realize that tolerating my discomfort, or distress, was only the beginning. Next, I needed to stop trying to control it and just experience it, because it is there to tell me something. My job is to determine what that is.
What is my body telling me?
Absolutely Tom - our body has so much wisdom and it takes practice to learn to listen to it, and to feel safe noticing and listening to uncomfortable feelings and sensations. Thank you for sharing your experience.
Yup. That is how I quit drinking, too. Meeting my pain with love. And becoming aware and willing to acknowledge when I was in discomfort (which was way more frequently than I ever actually knew before)- which goes to show you how much we really are numbing. For me, it got to the point where I was numb before I even poured my drink. That’s the power of an addictive substance.
“ It’s that simple, and that hard.” So true. So true, Ellie.
One of my favorite lyrics from a song is from Jason Isbell: “It gets easier but it never gets easy. I would say it’s all worth it but you won’t believe me.”
Yup. Best kind of hard I know.
Thanks for sharing here how to guide ourselves with compassion through the hard. 💕
Oh Allison your words really moved me. Thank you for sharing. And I love those song lyrics.
I really relate to how difficult it can be to even notice we're in discomfort. I still have that experience now: it's only when I pause and get still that I notice how much tension is in my body, and how often feelings of fear and sadness are here that I wasn't even acknowledging.
'Best kind of hard I know' - isn't that so true?