16 Comments

Ellie this was such a good read … and so relatable, my response feels so full I can’t get it into this comment for you ! Happy Birthday to your precious little son, and YES, he was born into Love ❤️

Expand full comment

Thank you so much Beth xxx

Expand full comment

Loved reading this Ellie. How lucky that River has a mum who is so aware and wants to protect his innate essence. It was also really interesting to hear your feelings about school. I always felt like I didn’t go to a good enough school and how I wanted to be pushed more/have more opportunity - really speaks to the point that educational needs/wants are so individual and yet our systems don’t reflect this. I’d love to have the resources to home school in a way that would work for me and my family but think in our circumstances mainstream will be the best option for us. Hoping to find a school that isn’t just focused on results but the wellbeing of the children - I think if they get that right everything else will follow. All children naturally love to learn in right circumstances for them. Hope you had a lovely time celebrating! X

Expand full comment

Thank you for your thoughtful reply Jennifer. Yes I so wish that schools prioritised the emotional wellbeing of every child rather than focusing on ‘good’ behaviour and academic achievement. But like you, I really don’t think homeschooling is an option. It’s such a tough decision! Thank you for the birthday wishes - River had a great day :)

Expand full comment

Thanks Ellie. Wow - don't get me started on how bad school is for some of our young people. Your experience of being at school and how it affected you is all too familiar, and chimes with mine. It's all about behaviour and following rules and rarely respects that there is an actually a person in there, in every child.

Expand full comment

Absolutely. I think schools seem better now but there still seems to be such a focus on 'good' behaviour and external validation.

Expand full comment

Sending love to you on your son’s fourth birthday. I am so sorry you experienced such a lack of humanity at school, it is totally heartbreaking. Like Lauren, I am in the first term of school life with my oldest and it is a new experience for sure. My main hope is that my very daughter will find her feet and thrive in her fullness. She seems to be doing well so far, it can be difficult in the realms of big classes etc but in the right place, it is possible xx

Expand full comment

Thank you Lyndsay, and that is comforting to hear your daughter is doing well at school. I hope the same for my son.

Expand full comment

Ooof, the description of the headmistress's only interaction with you hit me right in the chest. Appearance over everything is such a toxic, destructive force. Thank you for sharing this.

Expand full comment

I completely agree Patrick. It takes a lot to unlearn it!

Expand full comment

Happy birthday gorgeous boy and happy birth day Ellie! You too are so loved and I enjoyed reading this, while also holding your challenges in my heart. School is certainly a new layer I have found, but in so many different ways. I hope you can find the right place for R to remain curious and thrive. Xxxx

Expand full comment

Thank Lauren, really appreciate your words xxx

Expand full comment

I resonate with the fear of sending my son to school. We had intended to homeschool, but because we separated, it just wasn’t in the cards for us anymore.

I also don’t want my son to be put in a box, to have his wild and wonderful and creative self stifled. He’s in grade one now, and if it’s any encouragement to you, he’s doing so well. We will always be his first role models, and he’s taken such an interest in letters and numbers and sounds—it seems to be adding a new dimension to his creativity at home.

Sending our little ones into a world that sometimes causes harm is scary. I hope you find the school that aligns with you in as many ways possible ❤️

Expand full comment

Aleesha thank you so much for sharing this - it is hugely reassuring! Our plan is to give mainstream schooling a go and if it doesn't feel right, or River isn't happy, there is a big homeschooling community here and some alternative education options too.

Expand full comment

Thank you Ellie. Wonderful share about you and River.

The ick I get from schools now makes me want to educate my future offspring in a log hut in the woods. With the way they’re going—I’m not even joking.

It’s so awesome that you’ve become who you are all in good time for your son. I’m so happy for you all.

And of course…happy birthday River!

Expand full comment

Thank you Adam! And yes I relate re: schools. I am looking at homeschooling and alternative education options, just to reassure me that if mainstream schooling doesn't work out/doesn't feel right, we have other things we can do.

Expand full comment