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Aleesha Neal's avatar

Oof I just read the sarcastic comment you mentioned in your post and I just want to say that this person really wasn’t tuned into the depth of what you were communicating—that it wasn’t about your husband being gone but about being present to the loneliness that you suspect is always under the surface. I suspect that person is not present with their own feelings and is therefore actually unable to hear what you’re really saying. Your hurt is valid. And yet, your writing is so relatable to those of us who are becoming alive to our inner worlds.

Liz Gilbert talks about how in Eastern spirituality, there’s an understanding that we play a sort of hide and seek with the divine—we find it and feel that joy, then we lose it in our suffering, only to find it again. Like divine peek-a-boo. And I am learning to embrace that reality. Maybe even find the humour in it. Definitely trying to release the shame of needing to learn lessons over and over again!

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Tamzin's avatar

Thank you for the mention Ellie, I really appreciate it. I hope you can be so kind and gentle to yourself, especially on less sleep and that overwhelm IS very, well, overwhelming, no matter what it's about, it's how we feel it and how we process it that counts. Also, I think many of us are stuck in that swinging between wanting to get out there and change things, to feeling utterly useless and despairing the rest of the time (I've been writing some things about this, but haven't published any yet). Sending you so much support, you're doing great!

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